Lisa Gordon

Lisa Gordon has had work appear in numerous journals & magazines, both in print & online. She is presently working on a manuscript with the working title The freighted pedestrian. She resides in Quebec Canada with her philosopher husband. Djuana99@hotmail.com

Present Jane loves missing John

Stream of consciousness: Because desire is light well shadowed, because I lost you abandoning shadow, my body still speaks of what it can’t put to rest, shadows looming everywhere. A healthier problematic would see me making peace with the impossible, if only at later luminous stages of the night. I like to walk the shoreline thinking of the nothing I can entertain only there, knowing that it has to do with what I might dream of not ready, really, to fall under any spell – under any tidal under pull as strange blankness settles in, my thought of you, a precious thought, ungovernable on dim nights, anxious mornings after. There are footprints everywhere I go belonging to neither you nor me, yet somehow tracing out our trajectories over decades – I’m making this up, it’s one way I can get to the mysterious heart of the matter, finding me & you where we’ve never actually been until I claim we have – I’m drawing this out, how your singularity is at issue in where I go ready to once again recognize nothing, abandon everything, for the sheer fractious joy of doing so. All I am alluding to now was a long time ago, before I’d learned that this too would pass. If this all sounds particularly sad, well it is. Nevertheless it is lovely & substantive & fragile enough to disappear leaving no home address. I want to sing what I know of this in the forest where the tree falls & no one hears it – that seems a fine way to pay homage, alone, listening…

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